Normally, I'm not a fan of new year resolutions. I think its so cliche and most people give up after only a few weeks. Don't get me wrong I'm a huge goal setter, but I don't do it because I'm "supposed to" I do it because I want to accomplish something. This year has been hard, very hard. I hate to say it but I'm going to be one of those that says I can't wait until next year when I get a fresh start. I've been pretty good about going to the gym 4-5 times a week for the last couple months (minus the week from you know where when I was in the ER and this past week actually because I've been dealing with a cold/sinus thing) Anyway, it's been really good to go but I feel I need a goal to keep me motivated. I do not want it to solely be for weight loss either, that will come on its own and its not something that can keep me motivated enough to keep doing it. So, I've officially decided I want to participate in a half marathon. I think a marathon would be too much and I've already done a 5K before. It's funny I'm really not a fan of running, but over the last little bit I've started to like it more and more. The Salt Lake Marathon is in April and I think what better time, its far enough away that I can train for it, yet close enough I won't feel it's out of reach. Who knows if I'll back out, but a few months ago I would have laughed at the idea of it and well I just never know where 2011 will take me.
1. I may or may not have had 5 big pumpkin chocolate chip cookies from the store today...
She was seriously the best dog ever. She grew up with me, 15 years. I know it might seem dumb since she was "just a dog" but she was so much more to me. She was always there and I'm sad, but know she's not hurting anymore. Two of my favorite beings in the world died this year, I hope next year turns around...
PS I’ve debated using real names in this post, since it truly did happen and most of you would probably figure out the names anyway (or ask me) I’ve decided to use them. I also have decided not to go through and edit it, sorry if there’s too many errors and it becomes difficult to read. Wow, where to even begin this post. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for quite awhile, but it just never seemed the right time. I think I’m now at a place in life where I’m completely over the things that transpired, for a long, long time I felt I couldn’t say anything relating to that on here because certain people were not worth my time or energy to even worry about anymore. Well, I still feel the same way, however, I know things were said about me and since I never had the opportunity to defend myself, I’ll use this to share my side of the story (as I’ve said all along, I’m not taking the blame completely off me). And I realize the people it directly related to probably don’t read this anymore, but maybe for certain people who’ve heard the story, maybe partly true and not so true things about it, blog stalk me (cause, well I blog stalk people I’m sure they’d be shocked to know about…) Anyway, I’m sure some of you are dying to know what I’m talking about and others may have guessed it by now. I’ll just start the story from where I think things initially started down the wrong path. I’m going to start with a background. I was born and raised at a house in Taylorsville because my mom worked full time me and my sisters would stay with my Grandpa at a house in Murray. My parents decided it would be easiest to just put us in school there, so that’s what we did. We all made friends, after my grandpa died, when I was going into junior high they decided to switch to a school closer to our house. I never could really get into it, something always felt off like I was in the wrong place. So, my junior year of high school after talking to them, they let me transfer to Murray where I was back with my friends. That’s a little bit of our background, now I’ll pick up where everything started to happen. I started a new job working anywhere from 25-35 hours a week (timeline is around beginning of the year 2008, I was in my junior year of college), just finished an internship where it was roughly 15 hours a week and full time school (I can’t remember the credit hours probably 15). It started to drain me out, but I still wanted to be social and hang out with my friends. We mostly would congregate at Amanda’s house, which was fine it’s how it usually was. Staci was generally there, she had moved back from school, Maranda and Eileen. I was the only one working and going to school the majority of the time, each of them only had part time school or work. As things started to go along I usually could only get together on the weekends or an occasional weeknight, where they were usually together all the time, even during the day. They would call me, I just couldn’t miss class or work. When I would go over since I wasn’t always there, it was hard to catch up on things or for example they would always play rock band. Since I was barely playing it I wasn’t very good, when I would try I would lose for them and feel dumb so I’d end up not playing anyway and just sit there while they did it. Anyway, Amanda started dating a few different guys she’d meet off the internet. I did the internet dating thing too for awhile so it wasn’t like I was judging her or anything. But one in particular she let things go a little too far with. I felt she always looked to guys because she lacked confidence. She felt oh if they want to kiss me that must mean boys like me. Well, things definitely started changing after that. One particular instance I remember she picked me up one night to go either for ice cream or a drink or something. We hung out for awhile talking then she said she needed to go home. Later that night I was in bed and got a call from her dad asking if I was still with her. I wasn’t of course and said she had dropped me off several hours before, this made me very upset because she was using me as an excuse. I never really liked this particular guy, I felt he was just using her. I think he was, I can’t exactly remember what happened, but I know soon after he had a new girlfriend. Soon after this she started hanging out with someone new, again from the internet. At this point I was pretty much done with the internet thing. I will tell this side of the story and I’m sure its where they blame me for things going bad. I had a friend I met off the internet, we never dated though. His name is Joed (as a side note he’s engaged now and I still keep in contact with him and his girlfriend) Anyway, we all would occasionally hang out, he worked a lot and lived in Provo, so sometimes it was hard. It was rare just me and him would hang out, but once in awhile. One night we all decided to go to a movie. We wanted to see a certain one, we got there and would have been maybe 5 minutes late going into it, the time of previews right. Well Amanda threw this huge fit, we wanted to go to another one, but someone we just decided to go back to her house to watch one. At this point I was frustrated and just wanted to go home. As a side note they would regularly make fun of me. It was usually for little things, but I’m not one to become defensive about it. I know that’s what their intentions were to egg me on, but at times they went too far with it. I remember thinking I didn’t want to go back and have that happen again. Joed and I ended up just going home and not even doing anything. But again I think this is where they would begin to blame me, because of him when really it was that I didn’t want to be around people who were rude to me. Another instance I remember telling Maranda and Amanda I just bought my MacBook. They were both like why would you do that, that’s so dumb, why would you even need an Apple. I was like umm that’s my major, every program I use like FinalCut, is better on an Apple. I think they were just jealous they didn’t work hard for something they wanted. Again, I’m not quite sure on timeline I believe this was around December of 2007 Amanda started dating a new guy. I did not like him at all from the beginning. I honestly couldn’t tell you what it was, I just didn’t trust him (again after she had dated the other guy who was just using her) he was also a little younger and he wasn’t very nice to me either. I did try a few times, I remember one example we all went ice skating together. Well, again things happened, like right after they met too. I went to our other friends and asked them what they thought of him. I never said anything about what I knew between them, but only if they liked him or not. I never meant to talk behind her back or start rumors, it was truly out of concern. Well, they went back to her and told her what I had asked. I remember one night she called me just freaking out about how I went behind her back and what not. I said I was sorry, I didn’t mean it in that way. Well, things sort of smoothed over. Looking back on it now because I was the only one who knew how far things went with him she didn’t want me spreading that to everyone else, which I never did. One time she even had me go to the pharmacist with her to get a morning after pill, I didn’t like what she was doing and I didn’t like the guy, but I was there for her as a friend. Well, a month or so after that I got a text from Maranda asking if I’d heard from Amanda that day, I said I hadn’t. I remember it was a Saturday and I was at a family dinner at my grandparents house. She said she was worried about her, she hadn’t heard from her all day and everytime she’d text her in the mornings she was sick. This was like red flag thinking she’s trying to get me to tell her I bet she’s pregnant. I never had told any of them what Amanda talked to me about, so of course I’d never say oh maybe she’s pregnant. Anyway, she said she was going to call her and see if she could get a hold of her. I kept thinking something was off, it was just too weird for her to ask if I’d heard from her all day and then tell me how’s she been sick in the mornings when she calls. So when I was done at my grandparents I decided to drive by Amanda’s house and see. Everyone was there. I was so mad because I knew it was planned. Looking back I think Amanda was doing it on purpose and had Maranda text me on purpose to pretend she was pregnant, she would tell all of them of course there’s no way I could be, but if I went to talk to them anymore they would think I’m just saying it because I didn’t like her new boyfriend. Back to the story, so first I had my dog with me so I couldn’t go inside, second I was so mad I didn’t want to say something I’d regret. I did text Maranda and told her I saw her at Amanda’s house and knew she was there the entire time, because she had just sent me a text like 5 minutes before saying she still hadn’t heard from her. I can’t remember exact details of this night, but Amanda started texting me too. They were asking why I wasn’t coming over, I didn’t want to go over there since I was mad and knew I’d say something I’d regret. Amanda then started texting me and I believe Eileen did too somewhere in there. Someone eventually told me Amanda was pregnant, I think Maranda. I still did not believe her, I think she was just saying that to get me to tell her what I knew. Anyway, over the course of the next couple days everyone started texting me (I felt like we were back in high school) they were saying what a bad friend I was and how I should have been there for her. I explained my side that I knew Maranda lied and I didn’t want to be around her that night, she did later apologize for it. Finally, I apologized and said sorry I was not there I know it would be hard, but I just couldn’t be there first because of the family thing, then because of Maranda (and I had the dog in the car so I wasn’t going to stop) I remember Eileen saying she took her to the doctor on Saturday morning, first what doctor is open then for that and then she said I should have been there. I was like Amanda didn’t let me know she needed me there, I had no idea, she said well you should have just known. I honestly laughed thinking ok I’m not psychic. I wanted to put it all behind us and try to get over it, so finally I apologized. Amanda sent me this text using all sorts of colorful language saying what a horrible person I was (I still have them if any of you want to read it) and I should have been there, I’m a terrible friend and she could never forgive me. She also said she lost the baby and it was my fault for the stress I caused. Well, she “lost” the baby like 3 days after she found out she was pregnant, it doesn’t happen that fast and I knew she wasn’t ever pregnant. She did apologize the next day for how she said it but she said she still meant it. I finally was like ok, I’ve apologized for not being there what more can I do, she said nothing its unforgiveable, so I said ok and decided I had lost my friends. At this point I still would have been civil or willing to work things out if we tried a few months down the road. However, this was right after I started this blog I noticed a comment saying to visit their blog. It said some of the most hurtful things about me I’ve ever read. What gave it away and I knew it was them, was they used their initials for the title. I told my family and friends to look at it, they did and left some comments, the next day it was deleted. I saved a word document of what it said. I couldn’t believe they went this low and were just so hurtful. I decided at this point they weren’t worth my time or energy. About 6 months later I started receiving threatening texts on my phone. They were local numbers and said my address, name and they were coming to get me that night. They said I better be careful and watch out that night. I was scared of course, in the back of my mind I thought it possibly could be them. They said it was Andrew, I had met a guy in Park City (he got my number off my car, I never physically met him) So I thought maybe it was him stalking me or something. I tried calling the number and they wouldn’t answer. I finally filed a police report to see if they could do anything. My dad after calling all night, finally had someone answer where we found it was a phone in a store at the mall. With the police we got permission to view the security cameras and see who it was. We found out it was Staci and Maranda. My dad really wanted to file charges, I did not because I was pretty certain they would never harm me. We never did, but the police did call them. A couple months later my car was egged. It was done over a Saturday night and we didn’t see it until Sunday morning after the sun had baked down on it. It permanently ruined my paint when we washed it off. We called the police again, obviously we couldn’t prove anything. Well, that’s the last big things that’s happened. I hope they’ve grown up and realized how stupid their actions were. This is what I’d say to them if I could. I know you guys think you went through such a hard time and I don’t deserve to be friends with you. I finally am turning it back on you. How do you think I felt that entire time? In all honesty, I’m in such a better place now. I have friends that don’t make fun of me for every little thing. I was able to forget about all the drama and 100% focus on my education, getting done much faster then I ever hoped. I got closer to my family, for a long while I was quite the loser spending most of my time at home. I also became a better person overall. I was the one who realized the meaning of true friends, I realized how painful gossip is. Honestly, I hope to never see any of you again. Sadly since we went to the same high school, had a lot of the same friends and still live in the same city (as far as I’m aware) it’s caused me to be careful of my actions. I don’t think I’ll be able to go to any high school reunions. It has also ruined my reputation with a lot of people. Your families, I know you didn’t tell the real story to. I have no idea what you’ve said of why I suddenly disappeared, but it was four of you compared to me, so even if they didn’t think it was in my character they’d have to believe you because I didn’t want to be around you anymore to defend myself, honestly you became not worth it. Going back to what I was saying at the beginning. For a long, long time you weren’t worth my time thinking about this. Now though I’m ready to finally tell my side of the story, I’m not saying it was all your fault and not mine. I know there were a lot of communication problems and misunderstandings on both sides. I didn’t write this even expecting any of you to read it, but more for my own good, knowing the big picture what happened was not my fault. I tried to work things out, but there was only so much I can take. My last straw was reading that website about me, I couldn’t believe someone could be that cruel, let alone four of you. I’m glad I realized the type of people you became before I followed in your path. Like I said before, in a way I consider it a blessing in disguise. A lot of them were heading in directions I didn’t want to go. I couldn’t imagine the place I’d be if I still associated with them.
It has been eventful to say the least. Updating you all to my last post, I did get hypnotized. I think deep down I thought there's no way it would work on me, therefore I didn't care if people came to watch. I knew the true test for me would be doing it in front of people. If you know my personality in the least bit, I do not like being the center of attention, well last night I was along with I think 10 others. It's hard to describe the feeling. I remember pretty much everything I did, not really those around me, I just didn't care honestly. There also never was a moment when I was like I'm for sure hypnotized, it just happened. Anyway, I'm a believer. I always was in like hypnotherapy, but most of the time I thought the entertainment hypnosis people were just actors or wanted to do it for attention. I did order a video and as soon as it comes, I will relive the experience with anyone who wishes to see it. I know for those that were there with me, I will never hear the end of Stop Laughing!
Today, I made the executive decision that I am going to be hypnotized at the Salt Lake County Fair this Saturday the fourteenth day of August at the South Jordan Equestrian Park. I invite any and all to come witness this, I'm sure to be extremely embarrassing, moment in my life. As I'm typing this I realize the stalkers that are sure to exist on this world wide web, but they might not want to kidnap me after seeing what I do under hypnosis. In all seriousness (sorry I don't mean to make it sound like this sentence is important, haha) I really do want to go, we will see if the stars align. On a completely different note I FINALLY went back to the gym after my year hiatus and Sammi asking me for the past month, I just wish those places were free. It's like the dentist, you hate paying them but you gotta do it. Anyway, no worries I treated myself to some Cafe Rio immediately following the occasion. As a side note to the first topic, we did go to the fair last night. We walked around, I won an awesome pink dog after beating Sam in a game, and I of course got some fair food Yummy :) I also experienced something in the animal cages that I hope to never witness again. Well, I think that was random enough for one night...
Some persons are very decisive when it comes to avoiding decisions. ~Brendan Francis
This past weekend was a famous Utah holiday, the 24th of July or known around here as Pioneer Day. I headed down to Fairview with my family and a few bonus people (Lidia, Sam was sick and could make it, Sun and one of her friends) It was quite the day, started very early and we didn't get home until late.
(PS these pictures are in no specific order and I did not leave anyone out on purpose, to see if you made my photo album you may check my Facebook page and for pretty much the first part of the day I didn't take any pictures at all anyway)
My mind is here lately, too bad my body is sitting on the couch in Salt Lake City.
Me placing a take-out order and driving seriously out of the way to enjoy a $1.89 piece of scone heaven.
*Ahem* Word of advice never go grocery shopping when you've had a bad day, you buy a bunch of things you normally wouldn't because you feel sorry for yourself. That's what these were all about and yup, I've already eaten 3 tonight along with the scone I had an excellent dinner.
Wow, should we even bring this up. I've been better today only 3. Saturday, well we just won't even go there....
Catching my Grandpa making this pose at me. Check out his hat...yes he did put it that way himself.
Enjoying the peacefulness of Temple Square on numerous occasions.
Walking by this spot and realizing I found the perfect picture.Do you ever wish you could go back in time? Do you ever wonder if one single silly choice in life could possibly change everything? This is a topic where if you think too far into it, your head will spin. I'm reading a book right now called The Golden Spiral, its about these people who've traveled through time and one of them (the bad guy) tries to go back in time to change the main characters life around. She remembers her real past, but her family and friends only believe what he's changed. I've just been thinking about that lately, especially the time of life I'm in and all the big choices I'm required to make at my age. And I'm not necessarily just talking about the bad decisions. For example my major, going to school for anything is obviously a good thing. Well, what if I choose the wrong one for me. Sure, I have a degree, but was it the right choice? Overall, I'm glad there's no time travel, but I will admit there are definitely moments I wish I could change. And I still miss my Grandma like crazy. One thing I do wish is go back in time and spend more of it with her, especially these last few months. She was one of the few people I could tell everything to and I never had to worry about what she thought of me, I really miss her.
What a crazy past few weeks. Exactly three weeks ago my Grandma was taken to the emergency room, because of breathing problems thought mostly because of her history with emphysema. It was only realized after she had pneumonia as well as a mild heart attack somewhere in there. After a weeklong hard fought battle, she passed away surrounded by our family on Tuesday, May 11. It has been one of the hardest things I've been through and I know as time goes on, it may get harder. We had our first Sunday dinner without her there this past Sunday and it just felt so empty. I know eventually I'll slowly begin to heal. I find the greatest comfort knowing as long as I live my life being the best person I can be and keeping close to Heavenly Father I will see her again someday. In a way watching her during that week helped me let go, I knew how much she was suffering and that she was able to be released from her worldly body pains was a good comfort during such a hard time. I also had the opportunity to put together a "life video" if you will for the viewing and funeral. It was neat being able to look through all her pictures (JJ just happened to get a copy of every picture she had on her computer a few months ago) and seeing what she's done in life. She was so funny, she'd speak her mind and never left you guessing what she thought, and she was so pretty. I tell everyone I want to grow up and look just like her, not a lot of people would say that and truly mean it about their grandparents, but if I happen to get her genes in my older years I will feel very blessed. I feel very lucky I was able to have her as a grandmother for 22 years of my life. She was such a huge part of my life and in a way that makes this process harder, but I don't have any regrets. I now have all the memories of the past 22 years. I will work a little harder each day in honor of her and strive to become a better person to one day see her again.
Betty Jean Daniels Burnside Broadhead 1929 ~ 2010 She died peacefully Tuesday, May 11, 2010, surrounded by her family. She had fought a courageous battle against Emphysema for five years.Betty was born April 3, 1929 in Mt. Pleasant, Utah, daughter of Charles H. and Alice H. Andersen Daniels. She attended school in Eureka, Utah and North Sanpete High School, Mt. Pleasant, Utah, graduating in 1947. Married Bernard Burnside in 1953; he died in 1960. Married Kent S. Broadhead October 1, 1966 in Ely, Nevada; sealed for time and eternity in the Jordan River Temple September 10, 1997. Betty worked in earlier years for Mt. Bell Telephone Company in Salt Lake City. After marriage she "retired" to spend her remaining years as a mother, wife and grandmother. In the 1960's she was deeply involved in the Scouting program. In 1999-2000 Betty and Kent served as LDS missionaries in East and West Malaysia, part of the Singapore Mission. Betty states this was the happiest time in her life. She was a faithful visiting teacher and edited the monthly ward Relief Society news letter for several years. She was an ultimate organizer and a "Momma Bear" for her extended family. She was a Red Hatter, member of the DUP and an avid family historian. Her survivors include children: Raymond Shepherd, Phoenix, AZ; Ralynn (Robert) Buttars, Kearns, UT; Craig (Janet) Broadhead, St. George, UT; Charles (Sandy) Burnside, Taylors-ville, UT; Bret Burnside, Taylorsville, UT; also brothers Mont (Mary Jean ) Daniels, Ephraim, UT; Gary ( Gwen) Daniels, Murray, UT; Dennis (Milly) Daniels, West Valley City, UT; Michael (Karen) Daniels, Santaquin, UT; a sister, Patsy Joan Daniels, Terre Haute, IN; 13 grandchildren, 14 great-grandchildren. The family requests no flowers. If you choose, make a donation to the Perpetual Education Fund or a charity of your choice. Funeral services will be held Monday, May 17, 2010, 11:00 a.m. at the Jordan Stake Center, 3700 West 4700 S., Taylorsville, UT. Friends and family may attend a viewing Sunday, 6-8 p.m. at McDougal Funeral Home, 4330 South Redwood Road, Taylorsville, UT and Monday at the church, 10-10:45 a.m. Interment, Provo City Cemetery. 
As I'm rocking out in my Jazz jersey (#26 of course) while listening to them pound on Denver (it's only halftime hopefully it continues), I decided I really want to go to the game Friday. Anyone have an extra ticket, front row by the Jazz bench?? Come on, I know you want to take me : )
I'm back...for a short time. So, this was the week of being poked and prodded. I went to a specialist for the other stuff going on, where of course they wanted to run all the blood work again, I then ended up with a nasty bruise on my arm from it. On Friday I had to get the last set of wisdom teeth out. This story is kinda gross, just warning you. So, the second I get in there they take me back (it was on a Friday at 5:00 of course he wanted to go home for the weekend) I sit in the little chair and they put the little napkin thing over me and have me open my mouth. I'm thinking oh he's just using his little mirror to check it out so its safe to open my eyes. Well at that exact moment he had the novacaine shot coming right at me! I started freaking out (well in my head) He then does the other side and I'm scared to open my eyes for fear something scarier will be coming at me. So, he starts pulling on my left side, I feel pressure but not really any pain. Next thing I know his hand slams down on my jaw (maybe not THAT dramatic...) but it just popped right out. Well, then the tooth I could feel in my mouth and he couldn't get it out! I was beyond grossed out and was like get it out, with my mouth full of blood. He tries for the next tooth and I felt a sharp pain. I grabbed his arm and he finally got the hint and stopped. After two more shots of novacaine he tried again. I could still feel it, not too bad but I didn't want anymore shots so I just grabbed the chair. Well again, it finally popped out and the tooth was in my mouth. Luckily this time he got it easier. I was in and out in 20 minutes. Luckily, Lidia was there to take my home (I could have driven myself but after giving myself a panic attack I was so shaky and grateful for the company) All in all I"m doing pretty good. I've had to take minimal pain meds, just ibuprofen and my biggest complaint has been a constant headache I've had. I hope I don't have to go to any more doctors for a long long time. And one good thing I'm done with the wisdom teeth. Only a few more days of soft foods and I'll be good as new!
After a lot of thinking, I've decided to do this post. Even though he may read it (although I'm very doubtful) I feel this will start giving me some sense of closure. Before you all get too confused (although most everyone who I know reads this already knows) Cameron told me he can't pictures his life without his ex-girlfriend in it. I found out Thursday night, I was mad, beyond mad. Then Friday came and I got sad (I cried at work again, I really need to get out of that habit) I feel like since Thursday up to now I've been through every emotion possible. I've never really been through this before and quite honestly it sucks. It's interesting for a few months now I've been saying I just don't see it working out with us and it was almost like my mind was slowly preparing me for it to happen, I think I just thought it'd be me to have to do it. I was completely blindsided when he told me the reason. And I know in the end it all works out. I probably had to go through this all for a reason, but that doesn't make it any better. Many of you I'm sure have noticed I've been a bit anti-social. I'm trying I really am, but I really just feel like being closed off for a bit and I promise if there's anything I need, I know where to go.
I could have gotten really creative and come up with a scheme to trick everyone, but I just didn't have the brain power. I could have also done something really obvious that was a joke like I'm engaged or I'm eloping tomorrow or something, but who are we kidding you all wouldn't believe that. So, I will leave it at this, Happy April Fool's Day. I also pinky swore with Sam last night I wouldn't do anything to her or I'd warn her if I knew anything would happen. I considered the typical stuff like put an elastic over the sink sprayer so when she turned it on it would squirt her among other things, but decided it wasn't worth the trouble because I'd probably forget about it and end up getting myself. Onto a completely different topic I've been doing a lot of reflecting lately. In another month it'll be a year since I graduated. And true recent graduates aren't expected to be presidents of companies quite yet, but I feel like I'm in idle mode. My entire life has been geared towards working to the next goal. In high school it was working to get to college. In college it was working hard to get scholarships, then to graduating. Now that I"m out, I feel I'm taking the easy, float along path. Sure, I'm not a couch potato (except for the fact I got home at 6:15 tonight, started dinner, was in pajamas by 6:30, fixed a plate, sat down at the couch by 6:45 with my food and a movie and currently sitting here still just with a Diet Coke) I mean I at least have a job, go to Church and try to be an active part of society at times ex. sorority, the caucus meeting (yeah I'm not doing volunteer work in Africa, but its a start) But besides all that, nothing. I had planned to get my Master's. In reality I'd need to set those plans in place now to be there next school year. I'd have to retake the GRE, decide what program, get letters of recommendation things that take months of preparation, yet what am I doing...watching Friends and Facebook stalking people. I know this is getting repetitive, I'm more or less just sorting out in my mind what I should be doing or goals I should be working at. Maybe grad school isn't for me, but I need to be actively making myself a better person. Get more involved, more charity work, more involved with Church. Even though sitting wrapped in a blanket on the couch by 6:30 every night isn't good, I know its not my life calling and I need to try a little harder to be a little better.
Another week down with another weekend gone even faster :( Overall it was a good week, I had a lot going on during nights, so I didn't have a lot of time for rest. I had to go to the much anticipated traffic school for my ticket. It actually wasn't as bad as I thought, it was just knowing I paid $30 for it and the fact I could think of about 10 other things I'd rather be doing. I also went to my neighborhood Caucus meeting. My dad was elected a county delegate, I was tempted to ask someone to nominate me to like secretary (since you don't really do anything, you just get the title) but decided to let it go to old people :) Work was good minus me having a random mini meltdown for no reason. Luckily Shannon was the only one to see me and I was in control before I totally lost it, I really don't know what to blame, it was just a bunch of stupid little things that added up and I also blame the pill which I started taking this week, hopefully it will cure the other problems that have been going on. It's weird never before has things like that really bothered me. Part of it I think was knowing I would be giving Bella away the next day. Yup, my parents made me do it. I'm still really sad about the matter, but am slowly getting over it by not thinking about it. I also had to go to the dentist for a cleaning where he told me I have to get my top wisdom teeth out soon. If you remember on two separate occasions I've had both my bottom ones out. They became infected and it was just bad. He wants to get the top two out before I have the same problem. I'm really nervous, I hate the dentist more then anything. He says these shouldn't be that bad, but still can it really be any fun?? Besides that, there's nothing really else big to report I could really use a vacation, Cancun is calling to me...
It was a good weekend overall, there were great points and bad points (really the only bad point was being sick Sunday), but overall it would rank as good. I went to another Jazz game with friends, lunch at Nielsens, watched some movies and pretty much just relaxed. I also did a much needed detail job on my car, inside and out. Now hopefully it doesn't rain again soon. I also brought my guitar to my new house. I decided I need to venture out in playing. I know the notes but not really chords, which is opposite of most people. I also need to broaden my horizon on the genres I can play. Yes, church music is lovely, but I want to learn more. Hopefully bringing it here will encourage me to play more. I wanted to start tonight, but decided people probably wouldn't appreciate that at 10:00 on a Sunday night. No worries, I'll keep you all posted when I start a band and make it big :) if you're lucky I'll give you free tickets to my concerts.
I have no real reason to need to vent today other then I just feel like it. In all reality today was ok for a Monday, I wouldn't call it a great day but it wasn't bad either. Well, for whatever reason I feel like venting so here goes with a list of things that annoy me lately...
Seriously, where are you? After ruining a boxed dummy proof pasta salad tonight (I know and yes it is possible), waking up twice in the middle of sleepwalking last night and turning into a major space cadet at work I've realized I just really need the weekend. Some good rest, relaxation and just time to chill and I think I'll be good as new. I just wish these next two days would go super fast :)
As I'm sitting here at this mess I call a room, I'm reflective what I've been through growing up in here. It's a bittersweet moment. I'm soo excited for this new adventure and truly feels its the next step I need to be taking, however, anytime there's change it's always hard. I spent much of yesterday getting the big stuff moved in. I bought a new couch, bed, bookcase and of course got my lovesac and tv there. They were nice enough to let us start moving in then instead of everything tomorrow. Now I'm left deciding what to take from my old room, my parents are nice enough to let me leave everything else here, mostly furniture that won't fit or little trinkets that I'm not sure I'll want right at first. I'm also deciding on what things to keep. Of course I"d love to keep every little thing that serves as a memory of something, but on the other hand it's not worth it. I also officially am not a primary teacher anymore. That one was the hardest to give up. I love the kids I teach, they really let me go with a bang today, I had seven! I've had this calling for the last two years and a couple months and I've just loved it. I love seeing the new sunbeams come at the beginning of the year and how they just cry, but after a couple weeks they're so excited and run to give you a hug. I also learned a few lessons from them:
1. I I really really wish I was still in school, not necessarily working on my undergrad still, but in grad school
I planned to go to law school up until about a year ago
I’d be a millionaire if I took stock in Diet Coke
I’ve always loved dogs instead of having toy barbies and dolls as a kid I had dogs
I play the guitar
I really only know how to play church hymns and Green Day on the guitar, random yes I know
I love anything Disney
My favorite color is purple
Of course my heart lies with Utah but I’m really not a BYU hater I only say stuff to start controversy J
I’m extremely afraid of heights
I’m even more afraid of snakes
I wouldn’t eat a cheeto for a million bucks
I don’t really like pre-packaged food items for example Little Debbie snacks, twinkies even really chips
Because of 13 I should be skinny but I have a weakness for fresh bakery items
I can’t sleep in a comforter or sheets only on top with blankets (I didn’t think this was weird until a little Park City adventure and apparently it is…)
I have to do my laundry at least once a week even if I have clean clothes
I generally have a weeks worth of outfits picked out in my head
When I was in school and crazy obsessive planner I used to write out my weekly outfits…so I promise I am getting better
I used to never be able to procrastinate when it came to homework…then college came
Sometimes I still feel like I just graduated high school and I truly can’t believe I have a higher education degree
I love Mormon novel authors
I love apple products
I love Victoria’s Secret
I’m always cold and generally have a coat or sweater with me just in case
I’m usually over-prepared, if you need something I probably have it buried in my purse somewhere
Sometimes I wish I was shorter and sometimes taller
I always get frustrated with my hair but apparently I should be grateful for it and “supposedly” compared to others its really easy to do
I love Rocket Dog and DC shoes
I have a tiny crush on Kyle Korver
I love all sports and watch them even more then my dad
I love sugar cookies with frosting
The way to my heart is through Diet Coke
I love Friends
I love purses and have a ton of them
I love shoes and have a ton of them sadly I don’t wear a lot of them, mostly because I hate being taller then everyone
I love jewelry
I don’t have my ears pierced….yet
My favorite temple is Draper
Sometimes I think I should have been raised during the 1950’s
I have two of the best dogs in the world
I secretly love the Bachelor and Biggest Loser, well maybe not so secretly
I still listen to Nsync and Backstreet Boys
I don’t mind going to movies by myself
I’m a pretty good stalker, blogs, Facebook…in person….
I’ve traveled to two foreign countries
I’ve now become addicted to traveling
I’m terrified to snorkel again after the stupid fish attacked me
I still can’t believe I went parasailing…it was sooo high up
I’m in a very happy place in life right now
I wonder what the next step in life will be
I go to the “old lady” quilt night at my ward…the next youngest one there is my mom
As I was rereading the last few posts I decided I need to do a little spell check. I just want you all to know I'm not that special in how I write, moving right along this post will probably have just as many but oh well if it's bothersome don't read ;) just kidding. Anyway, Monday is official move out day. Guess who hasn't started packing or anything, yup me. So, if any of you have recently moved and have boxes you're willing to donate I'll gladly take them. I'm not even sure what to blog about I just decided to since I haven't in a couple weeks, I don't even have a topic to discuss. I'll do the usual, a recap. So Valentine's day was celebrated in a better way this year (most of you know I really don't like the holiday and no not just because its "single awareness day") it happened to be when Chinese New Year fell and since we've "adopted" a Chinese girl into our family what perfect excuse to celebrate it. She volunteered to make us a super delicious, authentic meal from there. I'm sorry (especially to Grandma) I didn't get any pictures. I did make heart cookies for the occasion, you can see the mouth watering picture of those on my Facebook :) I've been reading more, I just finished one haven't started anything new I decided to get through moving first. I decided I'm a little sad about losing my sunbeam teacher calling (I'm pretty happy about the blood drive one, its ironic they give it to someone who can't donate themselves...) Sunday will be my last day teaching. I figure I have the rest of my life to be a sunbeam teacher and only now to go to a singles ward so might as well take that step, plus I'll have Chalice to give me updates on how they're doing. This week I also had a little almost ER scare. I had the most unbearable stomach pain of my life Sunday. I almost went to the ER thinking it was appendicitis. I decided to wait it out a bit and luckily it calmed down. I was able to get into my doctor Tuesday for tests and still waiting for results. The doctor for now has me taking some sort of OTC "good" kind of bacteria...its like acidiphulus or something. Has anyone heard of it? Its supposed to treat lactose-intollerance and IBS which he thinks is the problem, a flare up of that. I hope that's all it is and this stuff seems to be helping for the day I've been taking it although I still have a sharp pain not sure what that's from. Anyway, my car is still fun although at times I'm sad I don't have a manual transmission anymore, its one of those sports shift where it can be automatic or you put it in manual mode, but its just not the same. I also went to another Jazz game and will also be going to one in March for sorority which should be fun. Ok, I realized I'm just starting to babble now and figuring a title for this post will be hard...but its just a recap of the last couple weeks and a preview of what's coming....I'll post pics once we're moved in and settled.
(This is oddly going to sound exactly like Sam’s post but I was thinking almost the exact same thing to say, she just did it first) As of last night, I’m officially moving out. It’s this super cute condo in Sandy, so I’ll be really close to work. I’m excited for this new adventure in life, plus I feel it’s a really good deal for what we’re getting it for and it’s almost brand new. I’ll post pics once we move in, in March and get things settled. I’ve thought about this for quite awhile, just didn’t want to make it public until everything was for sure, these things can easily change. With where I’m at in life, I decided becoming independent was a good step for me in life. But we signed the lease documents last night. Now the big question is, do I take Bella and should I buy a new bedroom set??
I officially need the world's worst blogger award. It's sad because I even have moments, where I'm like I need to blog about this, then I just forget or get too busy. I don't have a need to always be on my computer like before when I was in school, so I hardly ever turn it on anymore. I promise I'll try to get better, even if its short posts. I haven't blogged since the new year and I'll start by saying I"m not really a fan of New Year's Resolutions. I mean they're great for some people, but personally I like to be working on things all during the year, although the end of year can be good to review things, I don't generally make new goals only at the beginning of a year. With that said I'll do a little recap of 2009, overall it was a decent year with a lot of changes. I became a college graduate, I went on four airplane ride trips I like to call them (I don't generally consider camping trips as vacations) on those were some of the best and worst moments of 2009. I started a new "career" type job and considering the economic time of 2009, that is a huge deal. I welcomed a new family member, yes I am talking about the dog Bella although not all days do I like to claim her. I successfully went through 2009 without a car accident :) I became quite the daredevil by zip-lining in one of the top places in the world, went parasailing over the ocean, swam with dolphins and swam in the second largest coral reef in the world. I witnessed the first African American being sworn into presidential office. I had the great opportunity of free tickets to Jazz home games when I would shoot for them. I had the opportunity to join an LDS sorority, something I didn't do while I was a student, but am grateful for the opportunity. I had the opportunity to attend a funeral for a family member, I wish I didn't have to say bye to quite so soon, but know she's in a better body and had a greater need not on this earth. All in all it was a good year for me and I'm excited to see what 2010 brings. I've already had a lot of fun this month. Shelley for Christmas gave me tickets to an absolute amazing Jazz vs. Suns game on Monday. Even though I was sick and had no voice, I was screaming with excitement. I've also started sorority back up, there seems to be some fun activities coming up. I'm still a sunbeam teacher, now with 6 little kidlets. They're fun but definitely a handful. My car is still so much fun to drive. I'm a little shocked I haven't gotten a ticket yet, I guess I know when and when not to speed :) (hopefully the insurance company doesn't read this) Well, here's to 2010 I'm sure it will be a good one!
This very beautiful 2010 gunmetal blue Mazda 3 Touring. I LOVE it, although I miss my bug, we've been through a lot. I got an amazing deal and that was the only reason I did it. Well...and it's a lot of fun to drive and has some awesome extras, like bluetooth in the car, automatic with sport shift and of course new car smell.